The Stormtroopers are here to set the record straight!
The Imperial Stormtrooper: symbol of the Star Wars franchise, and galactic incompetence. Their inability to shoot straight and hit their target is a thing of legend.
In our previous conversation, the stormtrooper made a case for how such a sullied reputation may be unfounded, and presented evidence in form of a Rebel cruiser obliterated, and hordes of Sand people and farmers eradicated.
“When we Stormtroopers come to get you, you get got!”
“What a load of rancor crap. Me and Chewie made a clean getaway from you clowns on the Death Star, and I didn’t even have to shoot first.”
“Shut it, you pirate scum! We missed those shots on purpose.”
Are you trying to say that despite all that blaster fire exchanged, the Stormtroopers intentionally let Princess Leia and her liberators escape the confines of your very own fortified space station? I find that hard to believe.
“Well believe it! We were directed to curb our fire and let those criminals escape, so that they could lead us to their fellow lackeys in the Rebel Alliance.”
“I’m taking a great risk in letting them escape, Lord Vader.”
“Do not worry. My plan will work without error. WON’T IT, TROOPER?”
“See? W…We missed those shots intentionally. Though let’s see h… how good YOU shoot when you work for guys like these. M… My hands haven’t stopped trembling since the end of the Clone Wars!”
